Please don’t think that we say “eh” and “aboot”.
Thank you for returning the one idiot who does to their village, as they’re making the rest of us look bad (see Proverbs 10:10-23).
Please don’t think we travel by dogsled or canoe.
Thank you for understanding that this would pose an unclean problem should a doggy die + we have to touch it (see Leviticus 5:1-2).
Please don’t think our winter lasts three seasons.
Thank you for taking time to visit, and discovering it’s so nice here you might just fall in love with things (see Ecclesiastes 3:1-8).
Please don’t think that I live in an igloo of ice.
Thank you for realizing this would be impractical come spring as it would melt and my mezuzahs would fall down (see Deuteronomy 6:6-9).
Please don’t think of me as caring about hockey or beer for that matter.